Sacrifice, Reconciliation, and Joy: Homily for the Feast of the Holy Family – Year C 2021

Today is the feast of the Holy Family,
and as we look at the gospel reading today
we might be reminded of a similar story,
a more modern story.

A story of a family taking a long trip during the holiday season
who suddenly realize that they’ve left their young son home alone.

I’m speaking of course of that 1990 movie Home Alone,
where young Kevin McAllister believes he is being bullied
by his older brothers and sisters,
and ignored by his parents,
so he wishes his family would just disappear.

His wish gets granted when,
on the morning they’re supposed to be getting on an airplane
to go to Paris for Christmas,
they oversleep and have to rush to get to the airport.

And just as Mary and Joseph don’t realize
that Jesus has remained behind in Jerusalem,
the McAllisters don’t realize
that young Kevin has been left behind at home.

It takes Mary and Joseph several days to find Jesus
after they return to Jerusalem,
and it takes Mrs. McAllister several days to get back home from Paris.

In the end, Jesus is reunited with his family,
goes back to Nazareth with them and is obedient.
And Kevin is reunited with his family,
comes to realize how much he loves them,
and goes back to his normal life.
At least until Home Alone 2.

It’s good to look at these two stories together
because today the Church sets Jesus, Mary and Joseph before us
as a model of what our families should be.
But we might identify more easily with the McAllister family,
with their arguing, noisiness, and chaos.

Here in front of us we have the beautiful manger scene
with the Holy Family portrayed in sacred art.
It’s a beautiful, peaceful image of the sacredness of family life,
so calm, so holy.
Now imagine, if you will, Kevin McAllister and his family standing
down the aisle in the back of the church just inside the doorway.
A very different image of family life.

And now picture an imaginary line running the length of the floor
from the Holy Family to the McAllister family.
And suppose I asked everyone here to get up,
move to the center aisle, and stand somewhere on that line,
somewhere on that spectrum,
closest to the family that most resembles your own.
Think back over the holidays now
and recall the scene in your house just yesterday on Christmas,
or on Christmas Eve,
or the last time you gathered together,
or your last phone call or text exchange
with your children, grandchildren, brothers and sisters.
Where would you place your family on that line?

The Church sets the Holy Family before us today as our model,
but how could we ever measure up to that kind of holiness?
And yet that is our call.
To be a holy family.

How could our families ever be that perfect?
What could we do that would ever be good enough
for us to be called a holy family?

But holiness doesn’t come from our being good enough,
holiness is not the result of our own efforts.
There is only one who is holy, and that’s God.
Holiness comes from God being good enough,
and more than good enough, overflowing with goodness!
And wherever God is, is holy.
Our holiness comes from our connection to God,
from our relationship with God.

And so what we learn about family from the Holy Family
is that a holy family is one in which God is present.

The Holy Family was holy because Jesus was there,
and Jesus is God,
and wherever God is, is holy.
Mary is holy because she carried Jesus, cared for him,
treasured him in her heart all her days.
Joseph is holy because he protected Jesus, taught Jesus,
and devoted his life to providing for him.

Our families are holy to the extent that Jesus is present in them.
And Jesus can be present in surprising and unexpected ways.

If you think back over the past few days,
where were the moments of holiness in your own family?
I would suggest three signs
that indicate the presence of holiness in a family:
sacrifice, reconciliation, and joy.

Jesus, Mary, and Joseph lived lives of self-giving sacrifice.
Anyone who is part of a Christian family knows it takes sacrifice.
The sacrifice of time and attention,
the financial sacrifices, the emotional sacrifices, the spiritual sacrifices.
The sacrifice of dreams, perhaps, that we had envisioned for ourselves.
To be a Christian family is to sacrifice,
and all of those sacrifices can be signs of holiness.
What were the sacrifices present in your family
this Advent and Christmas season?
The sacrifice it took to bake Christmas cookies,
or to make Christmas dinner.
Time spent dressing the children for Christmas Mass.
The hours it took to wrap Christmas presents.
The money it took to buy those presents,
and braving the crowds in busy malls and stores.
Spending time in long lines at the airport
or driving over snow-covered mountain passes,
to get home in time for Christmas.
Shoveling the snow so that guests wouldn’t fall as they visited your home.
When sacrifices like these are done out of love,
then that is Jesus working in your family, making it holy.

Reconciliation is another sign of holiness in a family.
Jesus came to reconcile us to each other and to the Father.
Whenever Christian families reconcile,
the holiness of Christ is there.
Did any reconciliation happen to take place over the holidays this year,
no matter how small?
Even just the inkling that a reconciliation might be possible in the future
can be a sign of holiness.
Were there any apologies, handshakes, or hugs,
that bridged an angry or awkward divide this Christmas?
Anytime someone takes a step toward forgiveness
and embraces another in love,
reconciliation begins to take place.
And where there is true reconciliation, Christ is present.
And where Christ is, God is,
and wherever God is, is holy.

And then there’s joy.
Joy is perhaps the surest sign of holiness in a family.
At Christmas we sing “Joy to the world, the Lord is come.”
Think back on all the moments of joy you’ve witnessed
in the last few days:
The faces of the children and grandchildren opening presents;
the joyous singing of Christmas carols;
the feasting and laughter around the Christmas table;
playing board games or card games.
Enjoying each other’s company just for the sake of being together.
These are joyful signs of holiness.

Whenever there is sacrifice, reconciliation, and joy,
there is holiness.

Now it is very possible that for some,
that rather than sacrifice, reconciliation, and joy,
the last few days have been filled
with self-centeredness, division, and sadness.
The holidays can be a very difficult and stressful time,
especially for those who have experienced a recent loss,
or are alone,
or are in the middle of a difficulty family situation.
And whenever families gather,
there is always the possibility of conflict or jealousy.
But that doesn’t mean there was no holiness present.
God is present even and especially in our struggles.
And wherever God is, is holy.
If the last few days have been an incredible challenge and struggle,
and if you look back wishing that there could have been
just a little sacrifice, reconciliation, or joy,
remember that even the desire for those things is holiness.
Because that desire comes from God, and wherever God is, is holy.

And so as we recall our vocation to be holy,
and as we look at the Holy Family,
we may sometimes feel more like the McAllisters.
We may even wish at times, like Kevin,
that we could make our family disappear.

But we have a God who will never disappear,
and his presence can be recognized
in the sacrifices, reconciliation, and joy
that we experience as family,
and wherever God is, is holy.
Let us set aside some time this week
to recognize and name the holiness we experience in our family
and to look for more ways
we can sacrifice, be reconciled, and be more joyful.

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